Practicing Contentment

We were sitting on our grey Ikea couch under the massive, vintage pull-down world map that takes up most of our living room wall when I started listing all of the reasons we should join the Peace Corps. Or maybe go back to school. Or perhaps we should move to Europe. Or even buy a house that’s a fixer-upper and learn how to renovate. It’s couldn’t be THAT hard, right? Dave slowly turned and looked at me with a stressful look in his eyes as he frantically tried to gage my level of seriousness. I can’t remember exactly when this particular conversation took place – probably because we have it just about every other evening.

Does anyone else LOVE change?

When I was five years old my family moved into a white house in Michigan on a cul-de-sac and we lived there until around my tenth birthday. This five-year stretch is the longest that I have lived in one place so far in my twenty-six years of life. In the past ten years I have called five different states “home”, attended multiple high schools, two universities, studied abroad three times, got married, moved to Washington, DC, and now here I am. This summer marks three years of living in Washington DC and this week marks exactly two years of living in our current apartment.

We are about to start our third year living in the same space.

This realization has left me feeling restless and incredibly anxious for some change. Is a desire for change a bad thing? No, not necessarily. What is a bad thing? Not knowing how to be content.

Contentment just doesn’t come easily to me. I am a very future-focused person and although I love dreaming up possibilities and making plans, I have come to the realization that I often miss out on living in the present. I am a classic ENFP, according to the Myers-Briggs test, and ENFP’s are described like this: “They live in the world of possibilities… Always seeing the possibilities of what could be, they may become bored with what actually is.”

bored with what actually is. Ouch.

I want to be the type of person who is both excited about the future and good at living the present. I want to enjoy my life as I live it, not constantly romanticize about the future or what could be. I want to learn how to invest in a place and group of people for more than a couple of years and be part of a community for the long term. I really believe that it is possible to live a well-rooted life that is still filled with change and adventure. Is anybody with me?

So how do I get there? I am pretty new at this, but here is what I have been working on these past few weeks:

When I feel discontentment creeping in, I stop, take a deep breath, look around and truly look at all of the great things in my life right NOW. Then I think of three things I am grateful for and just meditate on them for a bit. Then, I just focus on praising God for all of the countless blessings in my life and for the people he has surrounded me with.

Simple, I know, but it has already made a world of difference. I am feeling a little vulnerable posting this because I would much rather have you all believe that I am a naturally grateful, content person, but that’s not really the truth. The truth is I am often self-centered and ungrateful, but I am a work in progress.

Could we end up joining the Peace Corps or going back to school or moving to Europe or renovating a house soon? I’d like to think so! But I want to be joyful and content either way. I am slowing learning not to let my joy, happiness, or contentment be based on my external circumstances but come from within. Pray for me.

Anyone else have suggestions for living in the present and practicing contentment? I would love to hear your thoughts!